hmmmmmmm.. i am not new here but i still dont know what to say. well today was ok nothing special at all.i wanna cry but i know it wont help anything.it wont do anything good and it will only cause chaos. iwanna forget somethings.i wanna just stop thinking be numb for a few hours and just breathe. i just cant help on thinking bout alot of things and im afraid of things alot of things.
i was once an emo a hardcore freakin emo.im pass that stage already, well so i thought i was. i was thinking about trying to cut myself to see whats gonna happen well i just though of it nothing more. i didnt do anythin at all. i didnt do its quiet shocking but i stop myself from damaging my skin.
i was once an emo a hardcore freakin emo.im pass that stage already, well so i thought i was. i was thinking about trying to cut myself to see whats gonna happen well i just though of it nothing more. i didnt do anythin at all. i didnt do its quiet shocking but i stop myself from damaging my skin.
.mind you reader who ever u are skin is essential to ones self. hmm these things comes to mind maybe twice a week only.
not because things are REALLY bad and CHAOTIC but its actually beginning to be in one way or another.
i keep on thinking to myself asking how did i get here?
analyzing what has happened recently. bad things and good things happens for reasons.
i kept things to myself up until now sharing once more my thoughts and all.all these changes only exists or points to one thing
"SURVIVAL"
i hate change because i lose things i value in life. but as i analyze things i guess we need change after all.
to be able to grow , to get to the point that we know who we are and why we're doin' the things we are doin'.
When ur heart is troubled all following actions of the body and/or the functions of the body maybe altered in many ways than one just to sooth the comfort that the heart yearns for. ive met a couple of people over the years and loved them all deeply specially some people who captured my heart and
broke by chance meaning to say ladies and gentlemen they are not the ones for me. so if yah got ur heart squished and got into a very bad splat no worries people their might be someone far more better than the previous one even if yah still love the person.
But as time fly's things happen and people whom ive met changed and i guess its ok it sorta happen's to people right?..
well the love of some people changed as well and that got my mind all screwd up but im fine now its all tightend up again.
but i know i wont be able to feel that way for someone and respect for myself. because when (i hope UR readin this) you loved me i believed in myself that there is somthing good inside of me.i must have done something right, i met you didnt i?
but since u changed ur happier they all say and thats what want for u, happiness.
im happy as long as you are and i miss you no doubt. i dont know how to make things right but all i know is that next time if god will allow another chance ill know how to treat and love you right. hoping he and u would give me another shot. all these sounds corny and cheap but what the hell i am already in to deep.
well my moms begging me to sleep already. its been 3-4 days straight that i havent slept in the right order. sorry viewers/readers what i just said was nonsensical and confusing . i am a chatterbox and my thought just keep on flowing like a river although sometimes my river of thoughts has its dry seasons ;)
thats all
my penny's for a thought
for today.
take care and thanks for reading
godbless
